Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
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Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
From : http://www.theonion.com/articles/recent ... -to,17824/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. Albums
August 2, 2010 | ISSUE 46•31
The former vice president searches for his favorite track on the 1986 album 'Inside The Electric Circus.'
NASHVILLE, TN—Finally unhindered by his wife Tipper's 25-year-long household ban on violent and sexually explicit music, former vice president Al Gore, 62, reportedly embraced his newfound independence this week by listening to the albums of the heavy metal band W.A.S.P.
"For the first time in decades, I get to play the kind of music I like without someone nagging me about what a bad influence it is," said Gore, sitting on the floor of his living room as he cued up the song "Animal (fu*k Like A Beast)" on his stereo. "And I get to crank it up as loud as I want."
"These guys are kicking some serious ass," added the two-term U.S. Senator. "Check out this guitar break coming up—it's nasty."
Gore, who was prohibited from hearing music with graphic sex, violence, or drug references since Tipper founded the Parents Music Resource Center in 1985, confirmed yesterday that her crusade was "total bullcrap." In addition, Gore said that listening to the forbidden W.A.S.P. albums over and over again had not turned him into a satanic dope fiend as his wife and her associates had warned.
Enlarge ImageGore enlists a couple of old friends to help him "ride the demon."
"It sucked because we always had to listen to garbage like Carly Simon and Lyle Lovett all the time," said Gore, who told reporters that he was "loving" being single again. "That stuff is lame, man. If it doesn't have big balls and bigger riffs, get it out of my stereo!"
According to Gore, being deprived of artists like W.A.S.P., Mötley Crüe, and Ice Cube for so many years only made him more curious. The former presidential candidate claimed that finally hearing them all for the first time was "like having [his] brains shot into outer space."
"I can't believe I wasted half my life helping Tipper put warning labels on this stuff when I could have been seeing these guys do their thing live," Gore said of W.A.S.P. "They used to whip raw meat at the audience. How bad-ass is that?"
"Cause I'm burning, burning, burning up with fi-ire! " added Gore, screaming the lyrics to "Wild Child."
According to Gore's personal assistant Eric Linscott, the Nobel Peace Prize winner has been spending most of each workday gorging himself on the songs "On Your Knees," "The Torture Never Stops," and "Show No Mercy."
"I spent six hours at Best Buy yesterday trying to find these Quiet Riot and N.W.A. albums he was asking for," said Linscott, who claimed he also purchased a mirror etched with the AC/DC logo for Gore's home office. "Whenever I try to talk to him about upcoming meetings or something, he just makes this, like, devil symbol with his hands or starts air-drumming. I'm really hoping this is just a phase."
Sources confirmed that Gore has also been catching up on movies that Tipper would not allow the 62-year-old to view because they contained violence, adult language, or nudity. He recently finished watching Purple Rain nearly 26 years after his wife forced him to turn it off because the song "Darling Nikki" contains references to masturbation.
Gore also announced plans to stay up all night watching Porky's, Fast Times At Ridgemont High, Red Dawn, and The Terminator.
"Why would I need Tipper when I've got all this?" said Gore, gesturing toward stacks of compact discs, vinyl albums, VHS cassettes, DVDs, and Nintendo games. "I'll tell you one thing: If she thinks I miss her, then she's out of her mind, because I don't. I'm living the dream here, my friend. I'm not lonely at all."
Added Gore, "Not lonely at all."
In related news, family sources reported that Tipper Gore has been enjoying her newfound freedom by taking 20-minute showers and leaving the lights on all day.
Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. Albums
August 2, 2010 | ISSUE 46•31
The former vice president searches for his favorite track on the 1986 album 'Inside The Electric Circus.'
NASHVILLE, TN—Finally unhindered by his wife Tipper's 25-year-long household ban on violent and sexually explicit music, former vice president Al Gore, 62, reportedly embraced his newfound independence this week by listening to the albums of the heavy metal band W.A.S.P.
"For the first time in decades, I get to play the kind of music I like without someone nagging me about what a bad influence it is," said Gore, sitting on the floor of his living room as he cued up the song "Animal (fu*k Like A Beast)" on his stereo. "And I get to crank it up as loud as I want."
"These guys are kicking some serious ass," added the two-term U.S. Senator. "Check out this guitar break coming up—it's nasty."
Gore, who was prohibited from hearing music with graphic sex, violence, or drug references since Tipper founded the Parents Music Resource Center in 1985, confirmed yesterday that her crusade was "total bullcrap." In addition, Gore said that listening to the forbidden W.A.S.P. albums over and over again had not turned him into a satanic dope fiend as his wife and her associates had warned.
Enlarge ImageGore enlists a couple of old friends to help him "ride the demon."
"It sucked because we always had to listen to garbage like Carly Simon and Lyle Lovett all the time," said Gore, who told reporters that he was "loving" being single again. "That stuff is lame, man. If it doesn't have big balls and bigger riffs, get it out of my stereo!"
According to Gore, being deprived of artists like W.A.S.P., Mötley Crüe, and Ice Cube for so many years only made him more curious. The former presidential candidate claimed that finally hearing them all for the first time was "like having [his] brains shot into outer space."
"I can't believe I wasted half my life helping Tipper put warning labels on this stuff when I could have been seeing these guys do their thing live," Gore said of W.A.S.P. "They used to whip raw meat at the audience. How bad-ass is that?"
"Cause I'm burning, burning, burning up with fi-ire! " added Gore, screaming the lyrics to "Wild Child."
According to Gore's personal assistant Eric Linscott, the Nobel Peace Prize winner has been spending most of each workday gorging himself on the songs "On Your Knees," "The Torture Never Stops," and "Show No Mercy."
"I spent six hours at Best Buy yesterday trying to find these Quiet Riot and N.W.A. albums he was asking for," said Linscott, who claimed he also purchased a mirror etched with the AC/DC logo for Gore's home office. "Whenever I try to talk to him about upcoming meetings or something, he just makes this, like, devil symbol with his hands or starts air-drumming. I'm really hoping this is just a phase."
Sources confirmed that Gore has also been catching up on movies that Tipper would not allow the 62-year-old to view because they contained violence, adult language, or nudity. He recently finished watching Purple Rain nearly 26 years after his wife forced him to turn it off because the song "Darling Nikki" contains references to masturbation.
Gore also announced plans to stay up all night watching Porky's, Fast Times At Ridgemont High, Red Dawn, and The Terminator.
"Why would I need Tipper when I've got all this?" said Gore, gesturing toward stacks of compact discs, vinyl albums, VHS cassettes, DVDs, and Nintendo games. "I'll tell you one thing: If she thinks I miss her, then she's out of her mind, because I don't. I'm living the dream here, my friend. I'm not lonely at all."
Added Gore, "Not lonely at all."
In related news, family sources reported that Tipper Gore has been enjoying her newfound freedom by taking 20-minute showers and leaving the lights on all day.
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. A
What a wanker. Like any of us are going to forget the PMRC debacle and say "hey, he listens to Metal now, top bloke really"...
fuc*ing c**t.
fuc*ing c**t.
DEATH TO FALSE METAL
Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. A
Surely this is a bit of a piss take though...?
Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. A
Wind up mate...Gojira1975 wrote:What a wanker. Like any of us are going to forget the PMRC debacle and say "hey, he listens to Metal now, top bloke really"...
fuc*ing c**t.
IAN
http://kissoffline2012.forumotion.co.uk/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Dont Take Shit from anyone...ever....
Gene Simmons 1984..
http://kissoffline2012.forumotion.co.uk/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Dont Take Shit from anyone...ever....
Gene Simmons 1984..
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. A
You think?Sour Mash wrote:Wind up mate...Gojira1975 wrote:What a wanker. Like any of us are going to forget the PMRC debacle and say "hey, he listens to Metal now, top bloke really"...
fuc*ing c**t.
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P. A
Bah! Bloody internet! Gertcha!
DEATH TO FALSE METAL
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
Hilarious! Top stuff.
The Onion's great, kind of like an online Brass Eye, 'Jennifer Aniston adopts 33 year old boyfriend From Africa' is very funny.'
http://www.theonion.com/video/jennifer- ... a%2C17768/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
The Onion's great, kind of like an online Brass Eye, 'Jennifer Aniston adopts 33 year old boyfriend From Africa' is very funny.'
http://www.theonion.com/video/jennifer- ... a%2C17768/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
highvoltage1969 wrote:Hilarious! Top stuff.
The Onion's great, kind of like an online Brass Eye, 'Jennifer Aniston adopts 33 year old boyfriend From Africa' is very funny.'
http://www.theonion.com/video/jennifer- ... a%2C17768/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
This made me laugh... http://www.theonion.com/articles/lady-g ... don,17789/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; (You need to see the picture in th actual article)
GOTHAM CITY—Supervillain Lady Gaga brazenly abducted Commissioner James Gordon from a charity fundraiser Tuesday, leaving police baffled and the citizens of Gotham fearing for their safety. Known for her outlandish costumes and geometric polygon hair, the criminal madwoman made a daring escape from Arkham Asylum last week and has been taunting authorities by interrupting television broadcasts ever since. "If you ever want to see Commissioner Gordon again, you'll do exactly as I say," Lady Gaga said from her secret lair, adjusting her angular yellow Tyvek and spandex dress as henchmen danced menacingly around the bound commissioner. While the kidnapping occurred at stately Wayne Manor, home of playboy jet-setter Bruce Wayne, the eccentric billionaire was not available for comment.
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
I love The Onion.. here's my favourite one from quite a while back. Do NOT click the link if you are worried about quite a few swear words.. and there's a 30 second ad before the video clip starts..
http://www.theonion.com/video/sony-rele ... snt,14309/
http://www.theonion.com/video/sony-rele ... snt,14309/
When did Motley Crue become Classic Rock?
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
That is absolutely the funniest thing I've seen for ages!!!largebloke wrote:I love The Onion.. here's my favourite one from quite a while back. Do NOT click the link if you are worried about quite a few swear words.. and there's a 30 second ad before the video clip starts..
http://www.theonion.com/video/sony-rele ... snt,14309/
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
Gore = W*A*N*K*E*R
I will never forget the congretional hearings footage of Snider, Bello, Zappa and other defending lyrical content.
this takes me back ....
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7C5kj1V ... re=related[/youtube]
I will never forget the congretional hearings footage of Snider, Bello, Zappa and other defending lyrical content.
this takes me back ....
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7C5kj1V ... re=related[/youtube]
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
Is the whole of this available somewhere? Only seen a few clips.
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Re: Recently Single Al Gore Finally Able To Listen To W.A.S.P.
Right on, Dan.Dan bach wrote:Gore = W*A*N*K*E*R
I will never forget the congretional hearings footage of Snider, Bello, Zappa and other defending lyrical content.
this takes me back ....
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7C5kj1V ... re=related[/youtube]
DEATH TO FALSE METAL